Thanksgiving 2018… yikes. We just moved into our trailer to find out our heating system wasn’t quite good enough for how cold it is, I just had a baby 8 days before Thanksgiving, and Indie was adjusting to a new home, new people, and new baby… So maybe it wasn’t the best of circumstances, but I’m just going to say it. I had the worst Thanksgiving ever. Is that really saying much though? Before this my worst Thanksgiving was one time when the rolls didn’t turn out very good, haha. So it wouldn’t really take much to make it even worse than that. But I’m telling you, this was the worst…. but… in hindsight maybe it was one of the best Thanksgivings I’ve ever had? “Hindsight” being the keyword here…
Like I said, I just had my second baby 8 days before. I was feeling well enough physically to go to our Young family gathering, but my emotions had definitely been at the surface, but I thought the gathering would be fun and it would be a good thing to do. I was also excited because I knew since we had somewhere to go that we would all get ready and cute and we could take our first little family picture as a family of 4! Well, the truth is I was pretty much on the brink of tears the whole day so no, I did not take a family picture.
My poor one year old is going through so many adjustments right now, and well, she really couldn’t handle anything. She clung to me the entire day, whining and crying at anyone who dared look at her. And, maybe it’s TMI, but my milk supply hadn’t regulated so I was painfully engorged all day and holding Indie really was not helping at all. She was so so grumpy and I felt terrible that I couldn’t make her happy and I also felt terrible that I couldn’t even have a conversation with anyone without her freaking out. I couldn’t eat without her freaking out. I couldn’t do anything.
After I knew I couldn’t keep in my tears for much longer, I asked Chance if we could leave. I felt terrible for asking because I knew he was enjoying himself, but he was so sweet and didn’t even hesitate to tell me we could leave. So we started getting our stuff together and Chance asked me if I had the keys. I didn’t, but he told me he put them in his sweatshirt, which I had put on to take Indie outside for a little bit. Well they weren’t in his sweatshirt anymore, so we started looking for the keys. After 10 or so minutes of looking, still no keys. I lost the keys. I LOST THE KEYS. And then I lost it. I just sobbed. I was so embarrassed. There were still so many people around and they were all having so much fun, and I was just crying. Still holding Indie… I just knew that I dropped the keys and a child picked them up and took them home (hours away) with them OR threw them in the garbage.
We were searching and searching and searching, and still nothing. Then people were noticing, and you know what? Everyone started helping us look for the keys. Everyone. And when we still couldn’t find them, I had people offering to take me and my kids home while Chance stayed to look for the keys. Clearly I was not handling it well, haha. Well a little bit later the keys were FOUND! Chance’s cute Aunt gave me a big hug and a big hug again while I just cried. And then I booked it out of there bawling all along the way. All the way home I cried. It was the worst Thanksgiving ever…
But was it?
My newborn Luna was actually an angel all night. I had to feed her once or twice, but then Chance’s cousin was so willing to just hold and love on her all night which was incredibly helpful since Indie was so clingy. And my sister-in-law asked me several times during the night if there was something she could do. There wasn’t really, but it meant a lot to me that she offered. And though Indie didn’t want anything to do with anyone, they were so nice to make an effort to be friendly to her and to chat with me. Then as mentioned above, everyone stopped what they were doing to help us find our keys, and my family who offered to take me home when I clearly couldn’t handle it anymore. And Chance not even being mad at me for losing the keys, being totally okay with me asking to leave, and trying to help as much as possible…
Maybe this was the Thanksgiving I needed. Maybe everyone needs one Thanksgiving like this. One you thought was terrible, but you can look back on and see how much you’re truly loved and supported. This Thanksgiving I didn’t get my family picture, and I was not feeling thankful for the food and the fun, but the people who were willing to sacrifice their good time to help me when I was struggling. So truly thankful.
